In Jesus’ Name

I realized tonight as I was praying with Corinne, that often when I say “In Jesus name, Amen” I am using it more as a punctuation mark, rather than really understanding what it means to pray in Jesus Christ’s name.
Jesus talked about the name that His Father had given Him, and that there is even protection in His name. We are to pray in His name, and if we ask anything in His name it will be done for us. So His name is obviously much more than a punctuation mark or something to be flippantly thrown around.
So that revelation, as always, led me to the question of—why do I act this way? Why do I not see and experience Jesus in a real way often times? How do I get to the place where the King of the Universe, the Lord of my life, and my Savior becomes a punctuation mark in my prayers?
As I was praying about this question, in God’s loving way He helped me to see what and why this keeps happening. It may be shocking and even disturbing to some of you but I ask you to really allow yourself to hear if this is you also.
I really don’t need Jesus…
Now before the heretic talk starts and the “Oh, he has finally lost it” thoughts begin to get going too much, let me ask you the same question.
Without using the textbook Biblical answers, why do you need Jesus today?
The reality in my life is that I really don’t want for anything. I have abundant food and food choices. More drink choices than I can imagine, I am warm enough in the winter and cool enough in the summer, I have a great variety of clothes. I have a car that can take me anywhere on this continent and when I run out of land I can buy a boat or plane ticket. I have doctors and medical attention for my every need. I even have weather forecasters to tell me what tomorrow is going to look like. What time the sun comes up and goes down. Will it rain or will it be sunny and how hot.
The internet has every piece of information I could ever need to know and some I don’t. I have connections through my phone, my Facebook, my Twitter, my Instagram and who knows where else you can find me.
On top of all of this, with one signature I can get a loan or a credit card to take care of all of my money problems, for a while at least.
So see, even though as a Bible believing Christian I know that I need Jesus to inherit eternal life, the reality is that in this life I very seldom need Jesus.
I am pretty sure that this world and its systems are all set up that way on purpose, because if Satan can keep me comfortable, fat and happy to where I don’t need a Savior then it is far more likely that I will just keep bumbling down the road of life until—well, until I get to the end and it is too late.
I am beginning to realize that this is probably why I experienced the presence of Jesus so powerfully in the Philippines, but struggle often times here to experience His presence. This is how Jesus Christ’s name becomes a punctuation mark.
Because of this I am left wondering if this is why we are not seeing revival in America. I know the prophets on TV and the internet are always saying it is just around the corner, but I have to believe that if revival is really coming. Then what is just around the corner is going to be persecution, struggles and lack. Because until there is really a need for a Savior, I think we are going to have a hard time finding one.
So the real question is, how do I find Jesus in my life here in the land of abundance? That has been the question that has been haunting me since I left the Philippines.
A couple of conclusions I can say are not the answer—creating hardship or getting discouraged about not being able to keep the amazing feelings from the trip.
I have realized that I am not able to accomplish much by either route. Again, all I am doing is trying to make Jesus fit into my box when I do either one of these things. This is really about having an honest and growing relationship with Jesus. The problem with relationships is that we are not always on the same page. Sometimes when Corinne and I are apart I miss her, but my love for her doesn’t change. When I am away from the kids I may miss them but my love for them doesn’t change.
So maybe the answer is that even when I don’t “feel” Jesus with me or I am not “feeling” like I am close to Him, the reality is that His love for me never changes and so therefore I need to work on my love for Him.
They say that absence makes the heart grow fonder so maybe this whole thing is about Jesus wooing me back into His presence. Maybe the answer is found not in the need but in the choice that I make for Him even when my physical needs don’t seem to require Him in this life.
Maybe that is really what love is all about anyway?
It is kind of like the cross and Jesus coming to earth. Most people will reject God’s offer for repairing the relationship that was lost. Most people will spit on Jesus and laugh at Him for even trying. But in the end, it was His love for us that made Him do it. It was His love that drove the nails and spear deep into His flesh. It was His love that caused the Creator of all things to come down to earth to save His creation.
He didn’t have to come; He wanted to because we had spent too much time apart.
So, maybe the problem all along is that I need to listen to my feelings but not allow them to guide me. I need to trust that even in those times where I feel alone and like I am just going through the motions—that is when I have to keep choosing to come to Jesus and believing that we are growing closer even when I struggle to remember who He really is. Truthfully I may forget the magnitude of Jesus’ name but He never forgets mine. If nothing else that should be reassuring.