Newness!

Today I am writing from a place of heartbreak. Not because my heart is broken because of any particular things, because the stories I have heard over the years of ministry have well reminded me that we live in an evil time and world.
The heartbreak that I feel today is because I got to experience the last 8 days with a group of people that are amazing!
10 kids, horses and a group of adults that love unconditionally—all from different backgrounds, all having different stories, but love was victorious as Jesus’ grace and love was poured out like few get to experience.
I have had the opportunity over the years of working with some amazing people and churches that are changing the world. Again, Camp Eagle Cap showed me that the world will be overcome by the love of Jesus through His people.
I got a random (God) call the day we got back from the Philippines asking if I could help with a camp. I said “I will help anyway I can”. I would be lying if I said that I was awake enough to even understand what I was getting myself into, or the incredible amount of blessings that I would receive from it. I am pretty sure that God worked it all out because He knew that I wouldn’t have gone into the situation the way I did, had I not been so tired. I would have been hesitant and wanted to know way too much.
We have been burned a lot… Usually by “Christians”– So I would have hesitated. But, since I said yes I thought I would let things work themselves out.
I met the director of the camp along with the mentor director and all of a sudden got a glimpse of what was happening. I could feel God moving in this meeting, so I offered our bus and whatever else we could do. Chester, the director and I are way too much alike; both visionary with a passion to see God move in people’s lives.
The next thing I knew I was one of the team and the ride had begun.
Our amazing bus driver (John) and I headed to Redmond to pick up the kids and staff and then head back. We got to Redmond and spent a great night at my best friend’s house there. That night and morning were amazing because even though he and I talk often, we don’t get to see each other face to face nearly enough and so Bob spoke some really deep things I needed to hear.
After breakfast we headed to meet the team and kids and get ready for the trip. As soon as we got there I could immediately feel that this was not a normal trip or time. It was going to be so much more.
By the time we got to POC we had already seen a bonding and openness with the kid’s that was divine and incredible.
We headed into the back country of the Eagle Cap wilderness area with a pile of horses, kids, stuff and people. But most of all love was already there. It was really exciting to watch as I got to see how people, who naturally love those around them, got to use their gift to invite each kid into the inner workings of the Kingdom of God. What they didn’t know is that I was watching too, and learning and feeling the love that I so desired to know again.
The unconditional love of fellow believers—without doctrinal statement comparisons or conversations of how we each stand on different points, just loving Jesus and allowing that to flow to those around us. I had experienced this in the Philippines but it has been a long time since I have felt it here on my home soil.
Corinne and I have been praying for quite a while that the Lord would bring fellowship to us that would help us to find that vulnerability and faith that we once had in God’s people. As soon as we got together I could see that I had been accepted and trusted. That I didn’t have to prove myself or fight for trust, but that I could just rest and allow what Jesus has been doing in me for the last 2+ years to freely flow.
For the last 5 years we have been in a struggling ministry, with little to no help and every time things start to get going someone comes along and kicks us right in the knees. We have realized that people locally didn’t really care what was going on in our lives and for sure didn’t want to hear what had happened and why we had left church. We were just “bad” and that was relayed to us again and again.
The cool thing about Camp Eagle Cap, was that it wasn’t nearly as much about leaders and trying to keep power and control but instead it was about followers, all leading each other to the Savior that we each one knew. The kids saw it quickly and in perfect child-like faith followed the adult’s right into the revelation of the Kingdom.
It wasn’t about professions of faith or the other stuff that seems to be so important to way too many people. It was just about loving each other and allowing God to work through that, in so many ways.
It was first fish caught, working together, hiking together, climbing together, singing together, laughing together and even sharing hard stuff with each other.
That was the part that I most loved! Every morning before the kids got up I found myself around the fire with some amazing Sister’s Coffee Co. coffee and a group of guys that were talking about really hard stuff, openly and vulnerably.
There is no doubt in my mind that this was the theme God had for the camp and that by the adults being willing to go there, the Spirit of God poured out the same desire on these kids. To share the life they have been living, with all its pain and struggle but also with the hope that somehow it can be different.
This went on every day that we were in the back country, and then carried into town when we came back—encouragement, love and speaking hope and life into each other.
There were so many miracles that I witnessed in this trip, from there being no mosquitos when there should have been enough to carry away a small child, to busses getting amazing mileage. The ones that touched me most are the ones that happened in me.
Today as we drove home I found myself being quiet and really internalizing what had just happened in my life. For the 2nd time in 2 bus trips the word written on my bus window was “Thrive”. What was God trying to show me and what had I missed the last time?
As I reflected today I began to realize that what He was showing me is that I can live in this way. This way that I experienced this weekend… Loving, trusting, encouraging and most of all falling in love with people again, God’s people.
So today I am going to choose to take my own advice. I am going to take home with me the things that I experienced at Camp Eagle Cap. I am going to trust that God is faithful; I am going to love people even when they don’t deserve it, because I sure don’t, and I am going to encourage others by my words and hopefully my life.
I don’t know how and I know that it is going to take a while to where it isn’t scary anymore. Because the feelings are still there from before but between the amazing friends and love we experienced in the Philippines to our new friends from Central Oregon I am going to allow myself to share what they shared with us. I am going to choose to not worry about religion but fall in love with Jesus so completely that we just hang together all day long. I am going to eat ice cream anytime I want because as I always say, ice cream makes anything better. However, I am going to eat it with Jesus and His people because that is really when it gets good.
Watch out because I think something broke and whatever it was I have a feeling that it is going to change the world.